Withdrawing Fellowship

If anyone does not obey our instruction in this letter, take special note of that person and do not associate with him, so that he will be put to shame. Yet do not regard him as an enemy, but admonish him as a brother. 2 Thessalonians 3:14-15

Recently at the church I attend, the disciplinary action of “Withdrawing Fellowship” took place. Although the words “Withdrawing Fellowship” cannot be found together anywhere in the bible, we do read about those who do not obey the instructions laid out in the bible and we are warned not to associate with them as stated in 2 Thessalonians 3: 14-15. After a church takes action like this, you may think: What about “Love”, the main focus of church is for everyone to love each other. If they really loved these people, they wouldn’t shun them like this. This action seems extreme, harsh. The people at this church must have a “holier than thou” attitude.

Initially, these thoughts seem legitimate. We don’t like it when negative things happen to our friends. We may even take our anger out on those who facilitate these negative actions. It takes time to study and think about why this has been done to understand the true meaning and purpose behind it all.

The first step is to examine what should be our and their number one goal in life. This can be found in 1 Peter 1:4 “to obtain an inheritance which is imperishable and undefiled and will not fade away, reserved in heaven for you,”. If this is our goal, it is our responsibility to do everything we can to help our fellow Christians and ourselves to accomplish this goal.

When we see a fellow Christian struggling, it is our responsibility to “…admonish the unruly, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with everyone.” 1 Thessalonians 5:14. We are to do everything we can to help those who are on the road to destruction to initially understand their situation and then to encourage them to come back to the truth.

If the erring Christian understands and changes, it is our responsibility to do what Paul said in Galatians 6:1. Brethren, even if anyone is caught in any trespass, you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness; each one looking to yourself, so that you too will not be tempted. Notice here that Paul tells us that we are to restore this person in a spirit of gentleness. We are not to talk rudely to this person, we are not to be harsh with this person, we are to be gentle; we are not to go behind their back and talk about them negatively to others which will stir up gossip. If we are talking to others about this person, it should be with their soul in mind, trying to find a way to help save them. In a spirit of love we are to talk to this person and hopefully help him to come around and once again be on the road to heaven.

Once we have stretched out our hearts in love to try to save the erring Christian, if they are unresponsive, we have to focus on the words of Paul and Timothy in 2 Thessalonians 3:6, "Now we command you, brethren, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you keep away from every brother who leads an unruly life and not according to the tradition which you received from us." It is our responsibility as Christians to look out for ourselves individually so that we do not get to close to sin so as to sin ourselves. We are also to look out for the souls of other Christians who are living righteously.

Finally, when all else fails, we have to obey 1 Tim 5:20 which says: “Those who continue in sin, rebuke in the presence of all, so that the rest also will be fearful of sinning.” Even in doing this, it is still our goal and desire to return the lost soul to Christ. It is a sad day when this type of discipline has to be done, but it is necessary to help keep the church pure and free from sin.

Now we come back to our thoughts. What about “Love”? Love encompasses the whole process. It is with love that we reach out to the erring person to save their soul. It is with love that we watch our actions so that others do not sin. It is with love that we finally mark this person so that they do not lead others away from the truth.

The action of withdrawing fellowship is extreme and harsh. This is the way God planned it. Sometimes it takes extreme and harsh actions for us to realize our impact on others and to shock us into changing our ways. It is not our place to understand everything, but to obey. Remember Isaiah 55: 8-9, For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways, declares the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways And My thoughts than your thoughts.

The true Christian will never have a “holier than thou” attitude. The true Christian is trying to follow the teachings of God’s word as closely as possible. If we have this feeling about someone, we should examine ourselves to make sure that we are not the one to blame for these thoughts.